February 2013 - “Fail” your way to Peace in the Puzzle

by Susan Myhre Hayes on 02/02/13

 “Fail” your way to Peace in the Puzzle

I recently attended a conference and in one session, the group was asked to explain what “failure” is.  People had trouble answering in part because it seemed clear. Failure is missing the mark, not making your goal.  It is a bad thing.

Try to explain it yourself, and if your definition is along the along the lines of screwing up, it probably doesn’t fit a Silicon Valley entrepreneur’s idea of failure.  To them, failure is an opportunity to learn from a mistake.  Failure rules out a path thus focusing them on another – and perhaps more fruitful – path.  It is a good thing when viewed in this light.

Little bets are risks you can afford to lose.  It is also the title of Peter Sims’ book, Little Bets: How Breakthrough Ideas Emerge from Small Discoveries.  I had the pleasure of talking to Peter recently, and he suggests that it is vital to take small risks and course correct until you reach your “goal.”  “Goal” is in quotation marks because he believes – as do I – that in most things – entrepreneurship or becoming your intended self- the “goal” only becomes clear as we continue to move towards it.  Little bets are things you risk and can afford to fail at as you discover your end goal.  Little bets and course corrections lead to your desired end point.

When I turned 59, I decided to get a tattoo on my 60^th birthday. I decided to find a symbol that meant something to me.  I made a little bet that lead to my desire to transform myself intentionally.  I choose a symbol that stands for self-transformation, and I got it on my 60^th birthday.   While I had changed many times in my life, I had never done so intentionally.  My little bet to choose a meaningful tattoo led me to the discovery of how much I admired people who have self-transformed.  The choice of tattoo led me to I make three little bets that if I quit drinking, got my finances in order and let go of expectations of others that I could make my big bet and write my book.  Peace in the Puzzle: Becoming Your Intended Self was published in late 2011.  And that larger bet helped me discover my purpose – to help others find theirs.  Little and increasingly bigger bets led to my piece of the puzzle and my peace in the puzzle.  My little bet - to get a tattoo - lead small discoveries – changes I needed to make - that lead to the breakthrough ideas in my book and transformed my life. 

Peter Sims is right.  Breakthrough ideas can emerge from small discoveries.  Breakthrough ideas that come from little bets.

Last year, three people shared with me that after reading my book, they quit their jobs.  For each of them, although the decision was a long time coming and the exercises in the book helped them make small discoveries about next steps.  All are on a path to something different.  I am confident each will find their peace in the puzzle. Doing the exercises in the book was a little bet. Have no doubt that quitting your job is a big bet.  So, if you are in a job that isn’t helping you and perhaps impeding from becoming your intended self but you don’t have a trust fund, what are some little bets you might make?  What can you afford to do with a manageable amount of risk?

Here are some possible little bets that might lead to small discoveries:

• The cooperative universe wants you to find your place in the world and is supporting you as you find it.

o   Ask someone who has known you for a long time, what you are good at. What is your gift?

o   Look back on your school and career path.  Where you are being led? What opportunities are being present to you?

• What part of the news are you drawn to each day?  Which magazines do you subscribe to or pick up in the doctor’s waiting room?

o   If you are drawn to needs in the community, is there is a nonprofit whose mission you are passionate about where you might volunteer? And, if they say no, ask another.

o   If you read about tech starts up constantly, are their tech people you could ask to do an informational interview with? And, if they say no, ask another.

·         Most people love to share what they have learned in their lives and are willing to do so when asked.  Is there someone you see as being successful that you could ask to mentor you into your next job.  And, if they say no, ask another.

·         Peruse online class catalogs.  Note which classes you are drawn to.  Consider taking a  course in an area you believe you could not only excel but be excited about.

·         Go to www.peaceinthepuzzle.com, choose an affirmation and start saying it – a lot.

What little bet are you willing to make to become the entrepreneur of your own life? What little bet are you willing to make to become the artist of your own life?   

Take it now.